I just found I have a very sharp tooth.The inside of one of my incisors(?)(trying to recollect class 8 zoology here) has suddenly turned nice and sharp.Funny I dint notice it before.I've been running my tongue up and down that side of the tooth for the last couple of days in fascination. Teeth are a very sensitive area for me. I am paranoid about anything to do with them.Even a glimpse of that small mirror like thing and that slightly crooked dentist's tool is enough to send me running in the opposite direction. I also have weird recurring dreams of my teeth falling and that I'd never ever get new ones. Maybe I need help.

The last week has been slightly mad. I've been running around here and there to get somethings done before I leave for home.Home? So which IS my home now? College Park is my home too! :-)

Last week we'd gone to the National Geographic headquarters at Washington DC. My friend/roommate was interning there for the last semester and there was this 'open day' like thing going on. We got to look around inside and also go to her lab. We met her supervisor and colleagues in the lab and spent time talking to them and getting to know what kind of work they do! It was truly wonderful. To be inside that office and see pictures and talk to the people who's work we have grown up watching on TV.

And of course DC. I love walking down the streets of DC and Georgetown.Every time I go there I fall in love with the city even more. If only it wasn't so expensive I'd live there.*wishful thinking* I'm really happy I live so close by though.It takes just 20 minutes to get there by the metro.

I just finished reading The Glass Castle by Jeannette Wells. Written very well, its about her life and her parents and the dysfunctional life they lead through her childhood. It takes you through quite an emotional up and down and at the end of it you wonder what makes people behave a certain way? Especially when they are responsible for other human beings, their children.

Too many thoughts, too many things to do, so little time.Till next time... Toodles dearies!

the countdown?

Ok, so the countdown has officially begun.. to going home this December. I never ever thought I'd look forward to going home so much. I mean, I'm pretty happy here, I've set a (non)routine for myself, managing decently -school and work. Most of the desi people here literally LIVE for going home. A trip to India is accompanied by 'wow's and 'awesommmme' and other similar adjectives. Beats me. If they dot want to be here, then why are they? I mean might as well go home right? If they think home is THAT awesome, then why did they leave? Did anyone force them to come here? I always feel whatever conscious choice is made should be taken as a learning experience. By complaining and whining, nothing is going to change, or help. And if it is something that CAN be helped, the bloody well do it!

As for me, I guess I'm missing family the most. And my friends, whom I've grown up with. I'm really looking forward to seeing everyone again. After this very eventful summer, I need some love from the parental unit and the friends, not to mention the brother. Who is growing taller every minute.I guess I am going to miss my life here. And I'm more confused than ever. Im hoping my trip home can answer some questions and make a few things clearer.

So here's to chennai'ness..Walks on the beach,Nana's biryani, shopping at the silver shops at spencer's plaza, late night ice cream at freez zone and snow field, pani puri and gangotree, stay overs at friends place, home made yoghurt, spending time with cousins, fighting for the TV remote with the brother,being woken up at 8 30 AM for the maid to sweep the floor, Amma yelling 'lei lei leyyyi*' in the mornings..and last but not the least.. my room and my bed! :-)


*wake up wake up wakkkkkke up!!

Its 11 30 pm on Sunday night and I'm still at school. A burrito bol, packet of chips, brownies, rice and channa, fries, coffee, 12 hours and other random stuff later and we're still half way through the book for the exam. sigh.

And another tag, this one I want to do.She dint tag me, but I'm going to do this anyway! :-)

Your oldest memories:

Fussing what to wear in the mornings before going to school. Yes. I was three.
Watching tadpoles in the puddles made by rainwater in Abacus (my school).
My grandmother reading to me in the afternoons and dad in the night before putting me to sleep.
Shampooing my barbie's hair.

What were you doing 10 years ago?

10 years ago, I was 13, in 9th standard. Most of that year was spent listening to all the teachers go on and on about the board exams we would have to 'face' next year. This was also the year Sne and I stopped 'playing' downstairs with the other kids and started talking more..We would spend hours on the terrace discussing what most 13 year old girls would. We read a few Mills&Boon books that year too!

Your first thought in the morning..
'Just five minutes more?'

If you built a time capsule it would have..
Taken be back to school to relive some of those days? Or would it take me a few years into the future to know what its going to be like? Where am I going to end up and who am I going to spend my life with? It feels like I'm the only one in the dark since all my friends are slowly getting hitched.

This year..
I started studying again..I moved to the US to do my masters. Learned to operate the washing machine(I know I was slightly pampered at home), manage my life and my house. I feel I have grown so much more in this one year than I have ever felt before.

What do you see yourself doing 14 years from now?
My mind is drawing a blank right now. I just wish I'm happy with whatever I end up doing.

Of disbelief and helplessness??

I wanted to refrain from writing and talking about this. The last 5 days have been absolute madness with what happened in Mumbai, we all know it and its all we have been talking about. Everyone is still reeling with shock, anger and the worst of all helplessness. Usually, we see people blaming each other, other groups and sects, and even the government. But this time, everyone seems to be taking the blame. The government says that they have failed, and so are we. Now, isn't that the most confusing bit? If the citizens ourselves take the blame of not being responsible enough, what are we going to do to make things better, in effect, damage control? Isn't that the worst feeling? Of helplessness? What are we going to do? And what is going to happen? Most of us, and by us I mean my peers and the people I interact with. Did we even vote the last time? I know a lot of us who dint. Do we have the right to blame the government and say that they are not taking care of us and we need to live in a safe India? What about those of us who are not living in India anymore? I wake up this morning and see my mailbox flooded with email and my facebook home page full of events on Candle lights and walks, and gatherings and marches. I am not against such gestures, nor am I against people or groups who organize such events. But what good is that going to do? Doesn't that just reinforce our position of helplessness and fear? Light some candles, walk a 100 meters and then what? Go back home and watch the news, cry out in disbelief and voice a hundred opinions as to what the government should do? I cannot deny that I am scared. I am scared for my family, my loved ones back home and for myself as well. What can I, or even we do today? Honestly, I do not know. And neither do you. So please, do not pretend to.